《难道我和医院杠上了吗》系列之:割乳腺叶状肿瘤记!堂堂连载!

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无比平常的一天,我躺在床上伸展四肢,惬意地摸摸这里抓抓那里,突然发现右边的奶子好像长了一个肿块?吓得坐了起来又摸了一遍,好像又没有。于是按照乳房自检法,对着镜子举起双手摇摆(诸君,见过商场门口的摇摆充气人吗),并没有发现肿块的影子。虽然如此,这薛定谔的肿块从此扎根在我的脑海。。。我仿佛一个欲火焚身的色情狂,时不时就要摸摸左边的奶子再摸摸右边的,回味一下触感,相互对照。连续两个月的摸奶之旅终于有了成效,我逐渐发现肿块只在我向上弯曲右手肘的时候可以摸到。怀着满腔疑惑我来到了医院准备B超一下看看究竟。

B超医生摸索了一阵满头雾水:肿块呢?在哪里??我立马弯曲手肘向医生展现我的企业级理解,医生顿悟的同时面色逐渐凝重:长这么大了?还是手术做掉吧,放心一点。拿过报告一看:边界清晰,没有明显血流信号,就是长到了2*1cm,在去年的体检报告上并没有这个肿块的影子。拿着报告去找乳腺医生,乳腺医生觉得良性可能性大,但大小可疑,做掉为好。于是我稀里糊涂地又一次踏上了乳腺手术之路。

P.S.补充一下摇摆充气人自检法:操作十分便利,你可以对着镜子举起双手像参加演唱会那样摇摆摇摆,如果你的肿块不会随着双手的抬起和放下而移动,就需要非常警惕,马上去医院看,因为可能是恶性的征兆。

做核磁be like:爱装修的邻居住你楼下而他拥有一把音乐电钻。。。。你忍无可忍终于拨打110并趴在地板上听筒贴地试图给警察直播扰民证据

The racism behind chatGPT we are not talking about....

This year, I learned that students use chatGPT because they believe it helps them sound more respectable. And I learned that it absolutely does not work. A thread.

A few weeks ago, I was working on a paper with one of my RAs. I have permission from them to share this story. They had done the research and the draft. I was to come in and make minor edits, clarify the method, add some background literature, and we were to refine the discussion together.

The draft was incomprehensible. Whole paragraphs were vague, repetitive, and bewildering. It was like listening to a politician. I could not edit it. I had to rewrite nearly every section. We were on a tight deadline, and I was struggling to articulate what was wrong and how the student could fix it, so I sent them on to further sections while I cleaned up ... this.

As I edited, I had to keep my mind from wandering. I had written with this student before, and this was not normal. I usually did some light edits for phrasing, though sometimes with major restructuring.

I was worried about my student. They had been going through some complicated domestic issues. They were disabled. They'd had a prior head injury. They had done excellent on their prelims, which of course I couldn't edit for them. What was going on!?

We were co-writing the day before the deadline. I could tell they were struggling with how much I had to rewrite. I tried to be encouraging and remind them that this was their research project and they had done all of the interviews and analysis. And they were doing great.

In fact, the qualitative write-up they had done the night before was better, and I was back to just adjusting minor grammar and structure. I complimented their new work and noted it was different from the other parts of the draft that I had struggled to edit.

Quietly, they asked, "is it okay to use chatGPT to fix sentences to make you sound more white?"

"... is... is that what you did with the earlier draft?"

They had, a few sentences at a time, completely ruined their own work, and they couldnt tell, because they believed that the chatGPT output had to be better writing. Because it sounded smarter. It sounded fluent. It seemed fluent. But it was nonsense!

I nearly cried with relief. I told them I had been so worried. I was going to check in with them when we were done, because I could not figure out what was wrong. I showed them the clear differences between their raw drafting and their "corrected" draft.

I told them that I believed in them. They do great work. When I asked them why they felt they had to do that, they told me that another faculty member had told the class that they should use it to make their papers better, and that he and his RAs were doing it.

The student also told me that in therapy, their therapist had been misunderstanding them, blaming them, and denying that these misunderstandings were because of a language barrier.

They felt that they were so bad at communicating, because of their language, and their culture, and their head injury, that they would never be a good scholar. They thought they had to use chatGPT to make them sound like an American, or they would never get a job.

They also told me that when they used chatGPT to help them write emails, they got more responses, which helped them with research recruitment.

I've heard this from other students too. That faculty only respond to their emails when they use chatGPT. The great irony of my viral autistic email thread was always that had I actually used AI to write it, I would have sounded decidedly less robotic.

ChatGPT is probably pretty good at spitting out the meaningless pleasantries that people associate with respectability. But it's terrible at making coherent, complex, academic arguments!

Last semester, I gave my graduate students an assignment. They were to read some reports on labor exploitation and environmental impact of chatGPT and other language models. Then they were to write a reflection on why they have used chatGPT in the past, and how they might chose to use it in the future.

I told them I would not be policing their LLM use. But I wanted them to know things about it they were unlikely to know, and I warned them about the ways that using an LLM could cause them to submit inadequate work (incoherent methods and fake references, for example).

In their reflections, many international students reported that they used chatGPT to help them correct grammar, and to make their writing "more polished".

I was sad that so many students seemed to be relying on chatGPT to make them feel more confident in their writing, because I felt that the real problem was faculty attitudes toward multilingual scholars.

I have worked with a number of graduate international students who are told by other faculty that their writing is "bad", or are given bad grades for writing that is reflective of English as a second language, but still clearly demonstrates comprehension of the subject matter.

I believe that written communication is important. However, I also believe in focused feedback. As a professor of design, I am grading people's ability to demonstrate that they understand concepts and can apply them in design research and then communicate that process to me.

I do not require that communication to read like a first language student, when I am perfectly capable of understanding the intent. When I am confused about meaning, I suggest clarifying edits.

I can speak and write in one language with competence. How dare I punish international students for their bravery? Fixation on normative communication chronically suppresses their grades and their confidence. And, most importantly, it doesn't improve their language skills!

If I were teaching rhetoric and comp it might be different. But not THAT different. I'm a scholar of neurodivergent and Mad rhetorics. I can't in good conscience support Divergent rhetorics while supressing transnational rhetoric!

Anyway, if you want your students to stop using chatGPT then stop being racist and ableist when you grade.

#chatGPT #LLM #academic #graduateStudents #internationalStudents #ESL

今天带了无糖小熊糖(aka拉稀小熊糖)放在办公室中间sharing的桌子上。那个总是吃但是从来不带任何甜食的同事今天正好在办公室。每次他跑过来抓一些我都暗自开心,希望小熊糖之神可以惩罚这个贪婪的人类。

周六晚的车厢里,喝得晕乎乎的靠在弟弟肩膀上闭眼小憩,我们并排坐,手拉着手。头顶时不时传来他柔软脸颊的轻触。我的手逐渐感觉不到实体世界,迷失在一片温柔宇宙。回到家里又听起郑国江的《旅程》,快乐是紧握你手

妈的。。工作怎么也做不完!就tm像滚滚山洪向我倾泻而来。。。

和弟弟手拉手轧马路,从河的这一边走到那一边。走过十年前第一次来时坐的伦敦眼,走过冬天和朋友们逛过的圣诞集市,走过天桥下的一群滑板爱好者,走过书市和旧画摊。冷风里只有手心是热的,弟弟生怕我放开一样,越抓越紧。从来没有和恋人手拉手在城市里漫无目的地走过,从一个轻松话题溜到另一个,脑袋进入一种松快又迷蒙的状态,好像在泡热水澡。回到家睡了十个半小时。第一次对这座城市有了亲切的感觉,原来不知不觉我已经把回忆存在了各个角落

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